How to survive festival toilets
While festivals can be great fun, there’s always one distinctive downer – the loos. It’s the smell that hits you first and what lies behind the door is often twice as horrific as it smells. And let’s face it, can you think of anything worse than having to deal with your period in a portable toilet? Fear not, we have top tips from festival pros on how to pee without too many problems…
Try not to inhale!
The smell of toilets at a festival – especially on the last day – is enough to turn even the sturdiest of stomachs. If you do have to breathe, then why not try this top trick from regular festival goer Martin: ‘I always have a little tub of vapour rub with me – just before I join the queue, I dab a little under my nose and voila, the toilet smell disappears’. Handy if you get a cold as well…
You know that jumpsuit with 20 buttons that you’d planned to wear? Ditch it. By the time you get through the queue (see below!), you won’t have time to undo each button. Make undressing as simple as possible – that way if you really can’t wait for toilet to become available, you can always commune with nature…
Dealing with the queue
You cannot do a loo dash at a festival. You must be prepared and anticipate when you might need to go to the toilet. This is because of ‘the queue’. It’s not all bad though – you may even make a friend for life during the very boring wait. Vicky remembers starting a sing-along at Reading festival during one particularly arduous toilet queue. ‘Everyone thought I was mental when I started’ she said, ‘but everyone soon joined in and I even made friends with a couple of people who I still meet up with at festivals!’
Bring your own loo roll
While each toilet might be well stocked at the start of a festival, it won’t last. It’s best to think ahead and bring your own. If you don’t fancy impersonating the Andrex puppy, toilet wipes come in a handy-sized pack and will also give you the added bonus of making everything feel fresh – for at least 30 seconds anyway.
Beat the bugs
Germs love a festival as much as us humans, however, not all mobile loos have working sinks. With this in mind, always pack some hand sanitiser, which is at least better than wiping your hands on your jeans.
Think outside of the (loo-shaped) box
If the thought of using a festival loo really fills you with dread, there are other options. The original alternative toilet – the She Wee now even comes with a shower extension and costs just £10. Of if you need a product everyone can use, bag yourself a Peebol – the pocket sized toilet! Lucy even uses the portable loo when she’s on the campsite. ‘When you’re all cosy in your tent, the last thing you want to do is leave it in the middle of the night to trudge across fields to the loo block. This is when portable toilets really come into their own!’ says the keen camper andfestival-goer.
Uh-oh, it’s that time of the month…
If your period falls at the same time as a festival, don’t worry too much. Pardon the pun, but you’ll just have to go with the flow. Unfortunately, it will mean more frequent toilet trips, especially if you’re wearing tampons, but if you’re camping try to use the toilet facilities there as they will be cleaner.
Sally, a camping pro, also suggests using Ziploc bags to store your tampons or sanitary towels in. They’re small enough to add to a handbag and will stay nice and dry if (or should that be when) it rains. It’s also not a bad idea to also take some plastic bags with you – some festival loos won’t have disposal units and you don’t want to be stuck with a used sanitary towel.
Finally, take plenty of spare pants with you – that way if you do have an accident, you can easily freshen up.